Will My Husband’s Low Sex Drive Improve Over Time?

I read the article you shared about being turned down by your significant other for sex. I have always had a high sex drive. However, I was cautious with who I had sex with and masturbated a lot when in my teens through college.

When I met my husband in college we had a great sex life and that continued through our early and mid 20’s. Then he started wanting it less and I still wanted it the same amount. I have tried many things to spice up our sex life. I know life is stressful and adding two young kids to the mix has made our sex life suffer even more.

He no longer even wants it weekly. When I talk about it, he has mixed reactions anywhere from understanding to defensiveness to blaming me or telling me I have a problem. He often makes different excuses as to why he does not. He refuses to get counseling and I am at a loss on how to fix this.

The last few years, while our sex was not as frequent as I would want it was always great! More recently, it feels vanilla and lazy. I try and tell him what I want or bring new exciting things into our bedroom and he rejects it. This leaving me totally unsatisfied. I day dream about sex a lot now and when I see an attractive guy I day dream about them too.

It sucks, and feel like my choices are slim: Accept this awful fate of a boring, sexless marriage or leave. The option of leaving seems so stupid over something so silly! Do men ever get a recharged sex drive as they get older? Do you have experience working with couples who find a happy medium in this? It is really humiliating and feels sad to me!